Brainstew

    If my life depended on it, I could easily write a list of all the things I know that I don't think about very often. This is a quite extensive list, and it would actually be a lot less trouble to list what I do think about. Of course, a list of what I do think about would be a rather inaccurate representation of my inner workings. Why? Because,
"                                                            "

• "I can do that later."

• Squeaker

• Food

• Welsh Corgis

• Writing

• Any of my characters

is entirely too organized to properly portray what actually happens in my mind. A more accurate example would be something like, "Okay, time to sit down and write. 'Worst case scenario, Darron didn’t talk to him for the better part of a week.' Hmm. What to write next? OH LOOKY, IT'S SQUEAKER. HI SQUEAKY? HOW ARE YOU? No. Stop it. You're supposed to be - WTF CAT WHY DO YOU SOUND LIKE I'M MOLESTING YOU? I'M NOT EVEN TOUCHING YOU! No. Ignore the damn cat. You should be writing. 'Worst case scenario, Darron didn’t talk to him for the better part of a week.' Oh, right. Uh, you know what? Let's go spend some time doing random shit on the internet. Maybe it will inspire you to- you know what? No. Screw that. There is cantaloupe in the fridge and you could totally go get some. Because fuck the internet, that's why. Okay. This is a hallway. I'm most certainly in a hallway. If I run down this hallway, the papers I've pinned to the walls will make a whoosh sound. It will be awesome. Yes, yes that was awesome. Okay. Cantaloupe. I've got this. What's that mom? Uh, sure, I'll cook dinner for- MERLIN! KITTY! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH THAT I'M AFRAID TO CUDDLE YOU BECAUSE YOU'LL HATE ME IF I DO..." and so on.  
    It's best not to dwell what happens inside my addled brain, just what comes out of it eventually. And no, I don't mean the clear liquid that sometimes leaks from my ears. I don't even know where that comes from; maybe the rocks had to pee or something.
    I have the vaguest feeling like this post was supposed to lead up to something slightly more important than the fact that my brain clearly has some kind of attention deficit disorder, but I can't for the life of me- Lasers. My cat is afraid of lasers.

_{I did all of that with the shift key. Not capslock. What is wrong with me?}