It really isn't that often that even a single individual chooses to attempt to disrupt the delicate balance of the lunch room by sitting in a place that, frankly, they do not belong. At least, not by sitting at the table that I've been sitting at during lunch since I was a freshman - except for a brief stint in sophomore year when I had second lunch and didn't want to disrupt the balance of the already unbalanced second lunch environment. Frankly, I am both passionately territorial about this table and unabashedly apathetic about it. Most of the time, it's not that someone is using my table, it's that I do not like to be displaced and further deviate from normalcy.
Depending on the size of the group of lost individuals at my table, I will either back off (large groups) or I will unceremoniously sit down at the table, regardless of who or what these individuals are. Generally speaking, most of these instances happen on days like today - days in which freshman have the same lunch as upperclassmen. This would totally explain why it happened today, except the individuals in question weren't freshmen, not one of them.
So, I get released at exactly 10:44 by Mr. Wong's sub, and I stroll on out to the commons, like usual, only to see a pair of girls - one of whom used to be quite affable (in fifth grade) - sit down at my table about thirty seconds before I could get to it. Initially I decide to say screw it and sit at an unoccupied table nearby. It's okay guys, sit at my table. But wait. No, actually it isn't okay. I only have a month left in this hell hole, and I'll be damned if I'm going to move for a single pair of misplaced girls.
Dropping my bag on the table, I sit down. I still feel strange because, frankly, they're occupying the seat I normally sit in. I'm unashamed and the situation itself bothers me about as much as having a cat on my lap. Out of all of the feelings I could have regarding the situation (including a sense of foreboding), I can only feel proud of myself for standing up for myself and allowing myself to continue to be a creature of habit.
My buddy, Crystal, sits down next to me and we start talking. Everything seems perfectly fine. The other girls - damn, I'm not even paying attention to them, but they didn't seem to be angry or anything. And then Kayren sits down, and suddenly it's like we've offended their religion and their favorite book right before sleeping with their boyfriends.
I'm vaguely confused by all of this. We never once made it seem like we wanted them to leave, and, in fact, after one of them stormed off to the next table over, Crystal actually invited them to sit with us. Because we're not petty like that, and we're actually quite friendly. It's not like there wasn't room for them. We haven't had a full table since Alex stopped bringing his (now ex-) girlfriend around. There are eight seats. There are five of us that sit there normally. Holy shit, there's room for two more girls.
But no, they're not having any of our niceties. Mason sets his bag down and goes to get his lunch right before these girls return with a swarm friends and occupy all five of the remaining places. By this point I'm starting to get the feeling that I've become involved in the most ridiculous game of chicken ever. And, dammit, I'm going to win if it kills them.
Mason returns to find his seat taken, a fact he finds fairly distressing. It's at this point that the girls launch into berating us because they were sitting there first, and tables aren't assigned, and blah blah. Honestly, by the time they got thirty seconds into their bitching, I wanted to smack them. Or, better yet, conk their heads together in an attempt to abuse some sense into them. We weren't being confrontational at all. Even after the girls started attacking us over it, we weren't doing much more than attempting, rather badly, to defend ourselves.
At one point, the girl I don't know points out that what we did was very awkward. We don't even know them, and we just sit down are their table? Like, WTF man? I'm sorry- oh. Wait. "Uh, I do know her. I've known her since fifth grade." Unfortunately, this doesn't stop what has become a flood of stupid pettiness. What did they hope to accomplish by prolonging the conflict? I mean, seriously? We weren't going to move. In fact, the only thing we did was put off getting ice cream until we were damn sure our table wasn't going to be completely full when we returned. Even then, I elected to forgo Crystal's generous offer of free ice cream mostly because I didn't want to feel sick all weekend, but also partly because I felt it was a good precaution to have someone hold down the fort.
So, in response to accusations of being complete strangers (which we weren't as evidenced by my knowing the one girl since fifth grade) Crystal introduces herself and is promptly ignored. Shortly after this, they apparently get tired of the confrontation and leave, moving straight past the conspiratorial whispering stage of the "You dun wronged me, betch," cycle to the gossip gal stage. I couldn't blame them, I wanted to tell everyone I knew about the two stupid girls who sat at my table and then picked a fight when I sat there too, too. The difference being, I was highly amused by the entire event by this time. It wasn't a source of anxiety at all, no, it was humorous, more humorous than an entire week's worth of failblog. In fact, I'm pretty sure I grinned when I was passing the one girl in the hall. And I'm pretty sure she pointedly ignored me. Even now, I'm highly tempted to add her on Facebook and mention how much fun I had at lunch in my request, not because I want to be friends, but because it seems funny to me.
I half expected to hear about myself during class. "Did you hear about those girls at lunch?" "Yeah, I heard they sat down at a table with people they didn't know! How scandalous!" At which point I'd promptly stand, because none of my classes were doing anything and say, "Yes, the rumors are true, I disrupted the tranquility of my corner of the commons to combat the greater threat of a complete upset of the delicate balance on the room's environment by passive-aggressively confronting two girls who were attempting to bring the building down around our ears." Or something epic to that effect. At least, I like to think I would have done that, but, well, it seems entirely uncharacteristic of me in the presence on anyone who isn't one of the people I consider to be a friend.
And, yet, I still grinned at that girl. Maybe, just maybe, my comfort zone is expanding to include non-essential personnel? A better question, is: "Why does this annoy me?"
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